Sexual Assault and Violence Intervention Program
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 Spring 1999, Table of Contents The Miraculous Reality of Healing by the Central Park Jogger Case History by Katie Thornton Adolescent Health Center's 30th Anniversary Legislative News by Jodi Licht Legislative Awareness Day by Charlene Thompson New SAVI Trainings by Alice Robinson Depression (a poem) by Mary Lee Adison
THE MIRACULOUS
REALITY OF HEALING Ten years ago I was gang raped and brutally beaten while running in Central Park. This event and its aftermath were truly horrible. Yet my life is now richer than it has ever been. Unfortunately, I have no magic, universal recipe for turning the effects of a traumatic event into a positive, growing experience. Every situation and every individual is unique. However, I would like to share with you a few of the healing factors that I believe were so important to me. Yes, I was in terrible shape. I was in a coma that resulted for the traumatic brain injury I suffered. One physician told my family that I would have been better off if I had died in the park. After coming out of that coma, some physicians were unsure if I would even be able to do simple tasks to take care of myself like buttoning my blouse. Medically, I cannot explain precisely what happened, but I am so thankful for the results. I witnessed my own body transform from a person sitting in a wheelchair unable to remember the events from a novel's previous page to someone who helped manage a bond trading floor and who ran the NYC marathon in four and a half hours! Crucial to my recovery was the love and support I received from so many. That unconditional love and support came from the obvious sources of my family and close friends. It also came from fellow workers, therapists, doctors, nurses and strangers from around the world. I believe that the power of so many, focused on my recovery through their thoughts, prayers and intentions, was an instrumental factor. This support, in so many different forms, was and continues to always be there. To this day, I receive cards sending love and well wishes from people I have never met. I believe another important aspect of my recovery was not harboring resentment towards my attackers. Perhaps I have been able to do this because I have no memory of the attack or the following six weeks. Yes, I did feel anger. Yes, I did insist on justice and participated in the process. But I was able to focus much of my energy on my healing. In hindsight, I'm grateful that I did not let the anger and resentment eat away at me and prevent me from progressing. Another healing factor was that I accepted the present situation and chose to work hard to make that reality as good as it could be for me. Physically, mentally and emotionally I was in a bad place and I realized that nothing could be done to reverse what had happened. In explicably, I didn't wish for a different reality, wondering "if only I had..." Instead, I concentrated on the reality that was mine and thankfully, the physical, mental and emotional aspects of my injury began to improve. Patience was essential because my healing was a slow process. Improvement was very gradual and did not magically occur all at once. Each slight success motivated me to keep pushing ahead and my progress seemed to just keep coming. The beauty of the process has been that the improving, learning and growing has never stopped. So, I took time to let myself heal. I did it in a way that felt right to me. In the process, I accepted my body and its new limitations but I also knew in my heart that some of those limitations were temporary. I believe that the body's natural tendency is to heal and that became a miraculous reality for me. SAVI and the Central Park Jogger, 2003 1999 Annual Benefit In recognition of SAVI's 15th anniversary, the celebration, which will include an open bar and a light buffet supper, should be particularly festive. SAVI will honor Captain Susan Morley of the NYPD, former chief of the Special Victims Unit of the Police. Captain Morley will be introduced by NYPD Commissioner Howard Safir. The guest speaker will be ABC TV news correspondent Lynn Sherr from 20/20. Linda Fairstein, head of the Manhattan District Attorney's Office Sex Crimes Unit, will introduce Ms. Sherr. You can support SAVI by coming to the Benefit and bringing your friends. Tickets are on sale for $125 for individuals and go up to $5,000 for a corporate sponsor's table. Ads and listings in a Program Book are available as well. SAVI also needs items for the Silent Auction and gifts for attendees. Since the beginning of her career in television, ABC news correspondent Lynn Sherr has covered a wide range of subjects, including those focusing on women's issues and social changes. These stories have won her many honors for excellence in reporting. Among her awards are two American Women in Radio and Television (AWRT) Commendation Awards, one for her report on an alternative treatment for anorexia and bulimia and one for an ABC primetime special she hosted, "Susan B. Anthony Slept Here." She received an Exceptional Merit Media Award frome the National Women's Political Caucus and a Maggie Award from Planned Parenthood for her abortion pill story. She also received a Pinnacle Award from AWRT for "How Far is Too Far?," her 20/20 segment on sexual harassment. In March 1999 she moderated a global videoconference entitled "A World Free of Violence Against Women" at the United Nations. CAPTAIN SUSAN MORLEY, NYPD Captain Susan Morley is a 15-year veteran of the New York City Police Department. She has devoted more than half her law enforcement career to helping victims of sex crimes, child abuse and domestic violence. Susan holds a bachelor's degree in Police Science from the John Jay College of Criminal Justice and is currently working on a master's degree in Public Administration. She is also a graduate of the FBI Academy in Quantico, Virginia. In 1993, she was recruited to command the NYPD's Special Victims Liaison Unit. SVLU's responsibilities include answering a citywide 24-hour rape/child abuse report line, conducting crime prevention lectures for school, community and business groups and training detectives on how to investigate sex crimes and child abuse with compassion. As a sergeant and as a lieutenant, Susan Morley served with distinction on several task forces addressing key policy issues. She worked with the Rape Crisis Hospital Committee to improve police response with respect to victims of sexual assaults. For many years, she has assisted with training Advocates for SAVI. Case History: Sex Stops Stabbing Never did I imagine having to explain that when a person is forced to have sex with a man so that he will stop stabbing her, this is rape. And yet, a few short weeks ago that is exactly what I was doing. When I phoned Metropolitan Hospital that night, I was secretly hoping not to be called, reasoning that not only it would mean one less person had been assaulted that evening, but also because, as a first-timer, I was afraid that I wouldn't know what to do. But before I could even ask for the unit clerk, the receptionist said a case was waiting for me. For a second I thought there must be some mistake; I hadn't even identified myself. Apparently, they had been trying to reach an advocate and thought I was responding to the beep. It was a domestic violence case, although the receptionist wasn't sure they should call anyone since it "legally" wasn't DV: the perpetrator was an ex-boyfriend, they didn't live together and had no common children. I jumped in a cab. As the stoplights flashed by I tried to remember what we had learned in the training. As soon as I arrived at the hospital, a nurse introduced me to Jackie (not her real name). Curled up in fetal position on the examining table, Jackie reminded me of a scared child wanting her mother. Standing up, she couldn't have been more that 4'10". How could this small, frail looking woman ever evoke anything but love and compassion? Suddenly, I wasn't afraid. Before me was a women who needed help. All I could offer was some information and a shoulder to cry on, but maybe, in the course of a few hours, it might make a difference. And so, we began our conversation. The story probably wasn't that different from many others, except that it was hers. She had broken up with her boyfriend a few days ago. She was surprised he took it so well, but, she reasoned, they hadn't been seeing each other that long, only a month or two. A few night later, her door buzzer rang. Since she was expecting her cousin, she buzzed the visitor in. Except it wasn't her cousin; it was her ex-boyfriend who started to stab her. The OB/GYN resident told me that Jackie had refused to answer any questions about sexual assault, and this worried him. After I let Jackie know that it was completely up to her whether she wanted to share the information with me or anyone else, she told me with a quiver in her voice that she had sex with him so he would stop stabbing her, but she wasn't sure if this was rape. I assured her there couldn't be a more clear cut example of rape. I was worried that her future safety was at risk. She seemed to be disassociating herself from what had happened. I could feel her hesitation, her despair. I imagine that this was not the first time a piece of Jackie's "self" had been taken away from her. I don't mean that she had necessarily been assaulted before, maybe she had, maybe she hadn't; but there seemed to be a lack of hope. She had been let down too many times in her life. She talked to me about her children who were in foster care. She was petrified that this would reflect on her ability to regain custody. She was afraid that the courts would see her as "unsafe," a risk to her kids. I told her I thought that this was all the more reason for her to get help for herself. By calling SAVI, where people would support her, she would be making positive steps to take back the control which had been stolen from her. Not only would she be helping herself, but potentially her children as well. I made sure that she had a safe haven to go to with locks on her doors and no threat of harm. I also wanted to make sure she had someone with her that evening. Fortunately, an aunt lived close by and Jackie felt safe confiding in her. After some more discussion, she decided to have a rape kit done and leave it at the hospital. Then, after all the evidence had been collected she was on her way. She did not seem too sure of the future, nor did she seem to have much trust in the various "systems" that were out there to help her. She did seem anxious to talk with SAVI and I hope that she did. Whether it was giving her a phone number, or acknowledging that she, indeed, had been victimized, I know I helped. I told her she had taken a courageous step by just coming to the hospital on her own. I'm sure that these things will stick with her and comfort her when she is in pain. I wish Jackie could know how much she also helped me in return. She helped me conquer the fears and inhibitions that I felt about being an Advocate on call. Most importantly I believe that in some small way both of us left the ER that evening a little bit stronger. "After
Silence: Rape and my Journey Back"* In 1985 Nancy Venable Raine was 39, divorced and living alone in Boston. She was attacked and tied up in her home and violated for several hours by an intruder she never saw. For a long time she could not bring herself to discuss the rape. When she did begin to discuss and write about it, she discovered that no one wanted to hear. She went to lunch at Chez Panisse in Berkeley, California, where she introduced herself to "the woman with the amber necklace," a well-known patron of the arts. "I thought your article was well written," the woman said. "But let's face it, no one wants to hear about such terrible things." When Raine attended a dinner party in New York, the woman seated next to her recoiled. "I just can't imagine how you can write about something so... so very personal." At another dinner party, this one for professional women, each of whom was invited by their hostess to talk about her current work, Raine, full of apprehension, described her book. There was a long silence. Then the hostess moved on to the next guest: "Shall we get off rape to something… agreeable?" But Raine didn't give up either speaking or writing. The following is an excerpt from her book, After Silence. Rape is, in some mysterious way, a kind of sex between males and females because the other side of the male's "passionate sexual desire" is the female's resistance and ultimate submission to it. I believe this view of sex silences, disconnects and isolates millions of rape survivors, who, if they live to tell their stories, "confess" at their peril. The book itself, as it came into being, seemed to lead me deeper into the heart of the confusion. Generous friends who read my manuscript as it went through several drafts showed me sides of the problem that made me feel I could never finish the book because the writing of it itself seemed to reveal more and more layers of meaning, each of which I needed to understand to go on. Two of my male readers raised problems with the manuscript that my women readers did not. In each case, the problems had to do with sex. My friend Paul, a novelist, had a problem with the description of the rape that baffled me. "Something is missing," he said after he had read the first chapter. "You've left out the sexual part. I think you chickened out."…. Paul was right. I hadn't described the feeling of the rapist's penis in my vagina, the state of my vagina at the time, the feeling of the rapist's penis in my mouth, his orgasm (which I hadn't noticed), or his manipulations of my breasts. I didn't think it was necessary. It seemed to me that I described "what it felt like" to be raped from my own perspective. Was Paul thinking that rape was a sexual act - that the rapist was motivated by sexual desire and that, although I was unwilling, like Scarlett O'Hara, in some sense, my unwillingness was part of the erotic content? Or was I overreacting. How many images had my generation absorbed from movies and books of a woman, usually an angry one, turning her back on a man in a gesture of rejection and the man roughly pulling her back, kissing her passionately? She struggles only briefly, then puts her arms around his neck and kisses him back with equal passion. A woman's unwillingness, these images suggest, is an essential ingredient of her pleasure, which can only be released by the man's aggression. Only then will she realize how much she wants him. This view of sex makes lack of consent by the female a part of normal sex. In a 1992 television interview with news anchor Peter Jennings, Dr. Barry Buckhart of Auburn University, a leading expert on men who rape, suggested that rapists are only one extreme of normal male sexuality as it expressed itself in contemporary culture. Buckhart made the point that flashing someone the finger in [an obscene] gesture is more than a terrible insult. Viewed symbolically it represents the fusion of sex and aggression in American culture. "This culture," he told Jennings, "teaches men it is okay to inhibit their empathic connection to women," and this is what permits them to rape. "Forced sex originates in the minds of men." Jennings concluded the program by stating that we are living in a "rape culture." Power and anger expressed through pseudo-sexual acts — rape itself — is a cultural norm… No wonder I can't get away from these confusions when I talk about my own experience. I cannot step outside of the system of beliefs that are the social context for my narrative. Being able to talk about my rape with the same ease I might talk about being mugged is impossible as long as I am living in a "rape culture." Another reader of my manuscript commented that it was difficult for him to understand how I was able to marry Steve after going though the rape. "There's the whole question," he said, "of how you could have sex with Steve after being raped. You're going to have to explain that." I was surprised by this remark, and mentioned it to my mother several days later on the telephone. "How could he have wondered how I could make love with Steve?" I asked. "Is it because he's a man?" "It isn't just men who don't get it," my mother said. "After your article came out, I got a call form Betty, who was in Hawaii on vacation." Betty was a close family friend who had known me since birth, a woman I loved dearly. "She was shocked, and wasn't even sure you were the author. She thought there might be somebody else with your name. Then she wanted to know if the article was true, and I told her yes. That you had been raped. I guess she thought you were writing fiction. She said, first thing off, that she just didn't understand how you could have gotten married after being raped." "What did you say?" With her usual skill at cutting to the chase, my mother answered, "I told her it never crossed your mind not to marry Steve." I had been surprised by these remarks although perhaps I shouldn't have been. Troubling feelings did intrude during sex with Steve early in our marriage, especially in my most vulnerable moments. Sometimes when we embraced late at night while I was in a semiconscious state I would become startled and would struggle to get away until I realized where I was and with whom. I worried at first about these occasional "emotional hijackings" in my marriage bed, but my concern about such intrusions in our love-making evaporated over time. In my case, they were infrequent and, like intrusions from the past in other contexts (such as sitting with my back to a door), I learned how to manage then. I was surprised by these remarks because I felt they denied the complex impact of rape on the whole of a victim's emotional and spiritual life by confining the damage to one part of her life. They also implied that consensual sex and rape were closely related-so much so that for some people the ideal that a rape survivor could enjoy making love with her husband was difficult to image, if not impossible to believe.
* ©copyright 1998 by Nancy Venable
Raine
MOUNT SINAI ADOLESCENT HEALTH CENTER CELEBRATES ITS 30TH ANNIVERSARY According to a recent New York Magazine article, the teenage girl is almost no doctor's primary business. She's too old for the pediatrician, too young for the OB-GYN, and there are too few experts who specialize in adolescent medicine (less than 1,000 nationwide). So where can young people find smart medical care when they are confronting major issues such as sex, smoking, and diet that will affect them for the rest of their lives? At the Mount Sinai Adolescent Health Center (AHC) which is celebrating its 30th anniversary. AHC was the first health service in New York State designed specifically to provide adolescents with multidisciplinary, comprehensive services that are easily accessible and confidential. Today, the AHC is the largest adolescent health care center in the country. Adolescents make over 40,000 visits annually to the AHC from throughout the New York metropolitan area. Check-ups and physicals, urgent and specialty care, family planning, pregnancy testing, counseling and mental health services as well as advice and support are among the services of the center. The AHC also offers a wide array of programs created to deal with the many challenges facing adolescents today. Among these programs are pregnancy and violence prevention, smoking cessation and teen parenting; as well as treatment and support for substance abuse, rape and sexual assault, obesity, eating disorders, relationship and family problems, HIV infection, and other sexual diseases such as human papilloma virus, linked to cervical cancer. This last virus is not tracked by the city Health Department, but AHC's Director, Dr. Angela Diaz (SAVI's Guest of Honor at the 1995 Annual Benefit), calls it "epidemic." Diaz tries to ensure that kids see the same doctor every time and build a relationship. And because she runs the place, "I make sure it happens." Teens are questioned closely about their habits, moods and concerns as well as whether they have suffered any sort of physical or sexual abuse, which is a strong predictor of depression. Looking towards the future, AHC is in the process of developing a research unity and is increasingly involved in advocacy at the local, state, and national levels. The Adolescent Health Center, under the inspired leadership of Dr. Diaz, continues to work closely with SAVI. The entire SAVI staff congratulates AHC on a job well done. SAVI'S NEW MANAGER, TERRY HENRY Terry Henry started to work with SAVI in August of 1998, taking over an important part of the management of the program. Responsible for all advocacy services in the six Manhattan and two Queens hospital emergency rooms, Terry works closely with the program coordinators, the hospital staff and with the advocates themselves. The other part of Terry's job is keeping track of SAVI's increasingly complex budget and financial status as the staff and program services continue to grow. Terry brings to the program many years of experience as an Episcopal priest in various parishes, including ten years on Martha's Vineyard. "Working with a large number of dedicated volunteers was one of the best parts of my work," says Terry. "I have always enjoyed the enthusiasm that people bring to volunteering." Most recently Terry served as Resource Development Coordinator for Rural and Migrant Ministry, an organization that advocates on behalf of the rural poor and migrants in New York State. "I feel it's important for non-profit organizations to have a sound fiscal basis in order to carry out their mission," says Terry. "In the past I've noticed that many non-profits fail to pay attention to their fiscal realities. I hope to change that at SAVI so that we can continue to provide services that are so desperately needed." SAVI'S NEW PROGRAM COORDINATOR, AMY WEINSTEIN-STRICKMAN Amy Weinstein-Strickman has been appointed as SAVI's new Queens Program Coordinator based at Elmhurst Hospital in Queens. She brings to her post six years of experience as a SAVI Advocate, a member of SAVI's speakers' bureau, and a group facilitator at annual Advocate Trainings. Amy's interest in helping people deal with trauma dates back to high school where she volunteered as an Emergency Medical Technician with two ambulance services. In college in Israel, she volunteered to work with children who had suffered traumatic brain injury. Back in the US, she attended Touro College of Liberal Arts and did research with Dr. Rachel Yehuda at the Bronx Veterans PTSD Clinic. Amy is currently in a post-graduate child and adolescent psychotherapy training program. She has a strong interest in post-traumatic stress disorder. "After six years of volunteering with SAVI," Amy says, "it's a pleasure to be on staff with the program. SAVI gave me my first clinical experience and inspired me to go into my current specialty." LEGISLATIVE
NEWS Public opinion is important to the legislative process. Legislators introduce, support and vote for bills that are important to their constituents. Grass roots lobbying efforts and even individual input can affect the shape of a bill as well as its eventual success or failure. It is of great importance, therefore, that those of us who are interested in public policy keep ourselves apprised of New York State Legislation related to sexual assault. The following summary of legislative activity may be used as a primer for initiating a dialogue with local representatives. A phone call or a personal letter can be immensely influential. A heartfelt appeal, drawing on your own experiences or on your work as an Advocate, can have a big impact. A.9268 - the Sexual Reform Act of 1998 - is of particular significance to both survivors of sexual assault and to those working with survivors. Specifically, this Act updates the sex crime code, strengthens definitions of sexual assault, and improves survivors access to the courts. In February 1998, the bill was passed by the Senate unanimously for the second time. At present, the bill is still being held in the Assembly. To become a law, it must be passed by the Assembly. Several pending bills, which SAVI supports, were passed by the Assembly in 1998 but are currently held in the Senate. These include: S.2693/Paterson - Sex Crimes Victims' Protection Act - which prohibits bail for convicted sex offenders and establishes sexual assault nurse examiner (SANE) programs; and S.365E/Volker - Rohypnol - which increases penalties for using Rohypnol in the commission of sexual assault. We also support pending bills presently pending in the Assembly. One such bill is S.7150A - Stalking Including Fear of Sexual Assault. This includes "fear of sexual assault" within a distinct stalking offense and authorizes eavesdropping and video surveillance warrants for the investigation of stalking. Some bills that have passed are: A.8898A - CVB Benefits for Victims of Crimes like Stalking - was passed by both the Senate and the Assembly, and signed into law by the Governor in July, 1998. The new law extends eligibility for compensation by the Crime Victims Board (CVB) to victims of menacing, harassment, aggravated harassment and criminal contempt. Other bills recently signed by the Governor include, A.6629B - HIV Reporting - which requires reporting of HIV infection to spouses of known sexual partners; A.11176 - Jenna's Law - which increases the length of sentences for first-time violent offenders including provision for sex offenders and victim notification; S.5183 - CVB Confidentiality of Records - which establishes confidentiality of CVB records to prevent access by criminals; and A.5699B - Kiernan's Law (Caregiver Registry). This last law gives parents the ability to request a criminal history check of a caregiver, with the caregiver's consent and authorizes the creation of a caregiver registry. This information is provided to raise your awareness of the status of legislation related to sexual assault. Remember that your contribution to the legislative process can be crucial. Another way to become informed and get involved is participating in the annual Lobby Day in Albany. Interested staff and volunteers from SAVI and similar program are bussed to Albany to meet with legislators and voice their concerns on these issues. Legislative
Awareness Day 1999 The day, February 2, was gray and wet. However, inside the State building, it was warm and bustling. Although the downpour was steady, our group was there on what seemed to be the busiest day of the legislature. On the steps of the Capitol building, I saw Mayor Rudy Giuliani walking briskly past me. When we signed in, you could feel the zest in the air. The halls were filled with women from all over the state. Singer Suzanne Vega, delivered a personal narrative. I listened with a great deal of identification and understanding. I was honored to be in the company of the women in my group. As we traveled the halls, we could hear the voting taking place of the Stalking Bill. We stepped into the hearing room of the legislature to view the voting. We met with Manhattan State Senator, Olga Mendez, and Brooklyn State Senator, Nellie Santiago. State Senator Eric Schneiderman informed us that they had passed the proposal and would have a committee go over the bill and fine tune it for the final draft. It felt good to see the working of the legislative system, especially watching the making of a bill that would make a change in the lives of so many. I believe one must be willing to go the extra mile to make a difference. New SAVI
Trainings SAVI is implementing a new Speakers Bureau Training. This is a pilot project aimed at improving our educational outreach and prevention services. Until now, volunteers who have completed our Advocate Training were given an additional five-hour briefing on how to present educational workshops and trainings, then sent out to schools, precincts, etc., as speakers. Now we are going to try to build a larger volunteer speaker staff, with greater daytime availability and more highly developed speaking skills. This means treating educational outreach and prevention as a separate form of volunteer work, rather than as an extension of the ER Advocacy program. With this in mind we have designed a 30-hour training focused exclusively on the skills needed to conduct effective workshops and trainings. The goals are to acquire knowledge concerning acquaintance rape, sexual harassment and related issues (including dating violence), as well as develop public speaking, group facilitation and counseling skills. Once the training is completed, SAVI speakers will conduct workshops and other outreach activities in secondary schools, colleges, social service and community organizations. The goals of such workshops are to help young people to identify and understand sexual assault, develop prevention and safety strategies, reject victim-blaming attitudes, offer supportive advice to peer-victims, and know where and why to seek medical, psychological and legal support. Some speakers will go on to learn how to conduct police sensitivity trainings and other professional trainings as well. Queens College has made it possible for their students in women's studies, urban studies or sociology departments to earn credit for participating in the SAVI Speakers Bureau program. Other colleges have also expressed interest in providing student interns for the program. This is a very exciting development. It represents an important enhancement of the link between the rape crisis and college community, both of which have resources invaluable to the other. Many of our ER Advocates have also signed up to train as speakers, once again displaying their tremendous commitment to reaching out to survivors and preventing violence in our community. SAVI has also held its first Criminal Justice (CJ) Advocate Training in Queens. This is another pilot project - one that grew out of SAVI's partnership with the Queens District Attorney's Office, Special Victims Bureau. With two full-time and two part-time social workers stationed at the DA's Office, we have become increasingly involved in the Bureau's "Riding Program," and in providing court accompaniment to survivors. The Riding Program was designed by the Special Victims Bureau to begin the DA's investigation and crisis counseling as soon after a sexual assault as possible. Thus when the police identify a case of sexual assault that warrants immediate investigation, they call the DA's office, which then contacts the on-call ADA and CJ Advocate. In responding to a call, a CJ Advocate may encounter a client at a police precinct, a hospital emergency room (not necessarily linked to SAVI), or, in some cases, at the scene of the crime. The training prepares Advocates to provide crisis intervention within these new surroundings, and will further hone their skills on working with police and other criminal justice professionals. CJ Advocates with daytime availability will also participate in our Court Accompaniment Program, giving much needed support to survivors of sexual violence, as they work with the criminal justice system in the hopes of regaining a sense of security, control and justice in their lives. Some will see these hopes realized, others will not. Whatever the outcome, our mission is to help each survivor find a way to continue the process of recovery. The CJ Advocate's support will be an important part of this healing process. In addition, this year, for the first time, SAVI will hold separate Advocate trainings for Manhattan and Queens volunteers. While this will require a considerable amount of additional program resources, it will make the training more accessible to members of the Queens community who, until now, have had to add travel time and expense to the already immense commitment of Advocate Training. Can't eat, can't sleep, can't
concentrate SAVI ART THERAPY GROUP |